<![CDATA[MAYA DIAMOND — Dating & Relationship Coach Serving the Bay Area: San Francisco, Berkeley, Oakland and surrounding cities - BLOG]]>Fri, 12 Jul 2024 09:55:03 -0700Weebly<![CDATA[Want love? My 3 Step Process for Having Love.]]>Sat, 07 Nov 2015 01:13:19 GMThttp://www.mayadiamond.com/blog/1There is an interesting thing that happens when one is single for a while.  The experience of longing becomes the norm.  I was a longing junkie.  This didn’t happen just from my periods of being single.  I spent most of my childhood longing for a loving responsible father, so the feeling of longing and love in my psyche were deeply interlinked.

When I was single, I would look at couples and long for what they had. I felt jealous, a deep ache inside, a visual reminder of what was missing in my world.  I walked around with this feeling of lack and longing for a beautiful relationship that I wondered was ever possible for me.

I believe that our thoughts, feelings, and beliefs create a strong energy that either attracts or repels experiences.  When we long for a loving partner, we often attract more experiences and feelings of longing. 
Pretend you have a pencil in your hand that you are holding, you don’t want it, or long for it, or miss it, you simply have it.  If you want to expedite your process of finding your true love, use the pencil as an example. The feeling of having a pencil is the same energy of having that you want to embody around love.  Don’t get me wrong here, I am not saying a pencil is like having a partner, but I am using the pencil as an example of the ease, trust, and lack of a sense of longing that occurs when what we want is at the touch of our fingertips.

Stewing in the experience of longing is risky. Instead of associating love with love, you will associate love with longing.  I know I unconsciously stewed my first 25 years in the experience of longing for a loving father.  Having a healthy love relationship mostly does not feel like longing, it feels like having.  What can happen when one thinks that love = longing, is that one attracts and loves unavailable people.  And thus the feeling of longing, is a endless cycle of pain and frustration.  This is exhausting and unfulfilling.  ​

So how do you get into the experience of having love you ask?

Brilliant question.:)  This takes some intention, consciousness, and play.  

Here is my 4 step process to get into the experience of having LOVE:  
1. Every morning when you wake up imagine being with a loving partner, imagine the person is there holding you, saying loving words, caressing you, bringing you flowers, and showing up for you.  As you see this happening, I want you to really feel this in every single cell in your body as if it is happening presently.  Smile and breathe deep into this vision.  Relax into this experience of having what you want.  Even though it is in your imagination right now, you are feeling the feelings of having and this is what is most important.  You are cultivating an energy of having love.

2.  Throughout your day when you notice someone doing a loving thing for you, like holding the door for you, paying for your lunch, letting you go ahead of them in line, complimenting you, hugging you, etc.  Really really take it in.  Let yourself really fully receive this loving act completely, and let yourself really notice how you are in the experience of having love.  Let this loving act multiply and expand inside of you.

3. Ask yourself, is there an important person in your childhood, who you constantly longed for love and attention from? Did you long for love from you dad? Your mom? Your sibling?  Was there a way that you grew up feeling like there was this love that was not being given- that was so close yet far away?  If so, your inner child inside needs some love and attention.  Take a moment everyday and place your hand on your heart and imagine your young child inside that wanted that love from that person.  And take a moment and imagine another loving adult giving your inner child the love and attention and care that you needed. Take that in.  Let yourself fully immerse yourself in this image of your inner child getting that love that it wanted.  Let yourself feel all of the feelings that come with that.  Breathe.

Do these 3 steps and watch how your life begins to blossom with more love, kindness, and receiving.  Everyday you will have more and more of the love you desire - instead of longing for it.

]]><![CDATA[ 5 Ways to Break Free of Toxic Dating Patterns]]>Thu, 09 Oct 2014 19:01:05 GMThttp://www.mayadiamond.com/blog/-5-ways-to-break-free-of-toxic-dating-patternsIf you are single and dating, and feeling stuck or frustrated with the process of attracting a relationship that is healthy, happy, and satisfying, there is a good chance you have an outdated, destructive and/or toxic dating pattern that is getting in the way.

What is a toxic dating pattern, you ask?

It's a pattern that you do over and over again and get the same frustrating and painful result. Here are the most common toxic dating patterns I see in my practice:
#1 Dating someone who is unavailable
#2 Giving up at online dating or dating in general too quickly and then feeling like dating doesn't work for you
#3 Attracting someone who doesn't give you what you need in a relationship and working hard to earn their love
#4 Getting attached and invested too quickly, and then the relationship ending and feeling disappointed 
#5 Choosing someone that is really into you but that you are not into and so you end up feeling unhappy in the relationship

Maybe you see yourself in one or two of the patterns above, or a combination of them.  What is important is identifying the pattern that keeps showing up in your dating life and taking a stand to shift it.  Usually these patterns are operating on an unconscious level of awareness.  The more you bring the pattern to consciousness, the more there is a possibility of creating something new instead.  So what do you do once you identify the pattern?

1. Work with a Dating Coach, therapist, or mentor.   By having this person as your guide you will co-create a healthy, loving, and supportive relationship in your life, much like you do in a romantic relationship.  This will create a new paradigm of healthy love in your life. In addition,  you will have an expert help you unwind the pattern and choose something different.
2. Take a stand.  Have a commitment ceremony with yourself or others where you commit to breaking these patterns once and for all! Tell your friends and family that you have this pattern and that you ask for their help and support in shifting it.
3. Notice the people in your life who have healthy relationships.  Ask them, what are your beliefs about the opposite sex, dating, and relationships? Also, ask them for specific advice about how to shift your toxic pattern.
4. Identify where the pattern originated  and what you would have to believe about yourself to attract something different.  For example, a belief might be "I always attract unavailable men" and you could instead  choose to believe "I attract loving healthy men who are available for committed partnership."
5. Use affirmations to anchor in the new belief.  Post the affirmations in your house, on your mirror, in your car.  Some affirmations I use with my clients are: I deserve healthy and fulfilling love.  I am worthy of love. I am great, he's great, I allow myself to let the relationship to unfold.  Time will tell.  I allow myself to receive more than I have ever experienced before in a love relationship.

Also, remember, you are not alone in having toxic dating patterns, it is very common, and the more you bring compassion and love to yourself, you will heal whatever is getting in the way of breaking your pattern.  

With the help of a coach, therapist, and/or mentor, positive thoughts and beliefs, support from your community - You can call in the happiest and most fulfilling romantic relationship of your life!]]><![CDATA[To Tinder or Not to Tinder?]]>Fri, 15 Aug 2014 14:29:47 GMThttp://www.mayadiamond.com/blog/to-tinder-or-not-to-tinder
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Tinder is unmistakably the hottest new app on the dating scene. People all over the world are swiping right and left to find love. What, "find love" you say? Yes that's right, even though people have dubbed this app, a "hook-up app", I believe there are as many or more people on Tinder looking for love as there are people looking for hook-ups. All you have to do is start swiping and you will see people writing in their profiles, "looking for a LTR", "here for a relationship, not hook-ups", "looking for the real deal,"etc. So back to the question... "To Tinder or Not to Tinder", many of my clients have found love on this app, and all in a relatively short amount of time. I highly believe in the magic that is tinder. With one swipe, you can be matched with someone who you share friends in common with on Facebook, common interests on Facebook (wow, we both like Yoga!) and within minutes you can start writing texts back and forth. The thing that is so special about Tinder is that one is forced to use not just their animal libidinal brain to make a decision (is he hot or not?!?!)...but also their intuition. With only a small amount of information, as opposed to Okcupid, Match, Eharmony, and the like, Tinder-goers, have to make a choice, otherwise they can't move forward.  Swipe right or swipe left? Some even call it a game, "do you want to play tinder?" But really, I think this app has a genius all it's own and I think if you are single you might want to check it out and see for yourself. Of course the downside to this app is the flip side to its genius, you have very little information about someone so there may be a lack of being on the same page - so you must do some sleuthing in the beginning, and ask great questions. Find out where they live, what their career is, what they are passionate about, where they grew up. You will get important information very quickly. Since you don't know why people are using the app, I advise all my clients to ask within the first couple of messages, "what brings you to tinder?" Or, "why are you on this site? " or "what is your intention for being on tinder." Then listen closely to their response. That way you will be able to separate those who just want a hook-up from those who want to create lasting love. 

]]><![CDATA[NEXT Being the Beloved 12-Weeeks to Living Your Feminine Power begins 3/17/2014 ]]>Fri, 21 Feb 2014 17:08:11 GMThttp://www.mayadiamond.com/blog/next-being-the-beloved-12-weeeks-to-living-your-feminine-power-begins-3172014Picture

FREE Intro Night 
Wednesday February 26th from 7-8:30pm

Are you ready to step into your feminine power, self-love, and passion?

Being the Beloved: 12-Weeks to Living Your Feminine Power



Mondays from 7pm-9pm in Berkeley

beginning March 17th 2014

*Connect with your true worth

*Love yourself unconditionally

*Feel beautiful inside and out

*Feel more nourished, satisfied, and rejuvenated in your life

*Rediscover your passionate self through the expressive arts

*Get more clarity about what you want and increase your ability to ask for it

*Learn how to listen to your inner wise guide and feel more powerful 
about your choices

Past participants of this group have reported: 
-career advancement 
-increased satisfaction in romantic relationship 
-more ease, joy, and happiness 
-focus and clarity and action about next steps in career 
-creative expression enhanced 
-healthier and more satisfying female

FREE Intro Night 
Wednesday February 26th 7-8:30pm  RSVP now to diamondlifecoaching@gmail.com to reserve your spot. You will receive a confirmation email with directions and the address/door code to the event. NOTE: You must RSVP to attend. 

Be supported in a group of inspiring women to love yourself unconditionally, live your passions, and step into your power. Not only will you receive coaching from me but you will also receive the wisdom and feedback from the members of the group.

Can't make it to the intro night but are interested in joining the group: 
simply call 415-672-5972 or email me at diamondlifecoaching@gmail.com 
and I'll be in touch.

past clients have said about the work:

"Being in Maya's Women's Coaching group helped me on many levels. I 
now feel more connected to myself and other women, my creativity and 
self-esteem have been strengthened, and I have a lot of new resources 
for dealing with stress and self-doubt. I would recommend this group 
to anyone who feels that they are stuck and are ready to make positive 
changes in their lives."

-Anonymous, SF

"Maya has helped me make so many positive changes in my life, from 
advancing my career, to greatly improving my financial situation, and 
guiding me into a new relationship. Maya has so many different 
techniques for helping to break through obstacles, so she offers 
something for everyone!"

-K.K., Los Angeles

"Maya feels like an equal...that rare person that comes along and lets 
us be fully ourselves and yet also mirrors what we can work on and 
become. She has an amazing ability to tap into what I am needing to 
look at in order to get my lessons out of a certain experience."

-H.H., Asheville, NC

"Maya ties in her wide range of knowledge about somatic therapy, 
enneagram, astrology, spirituality, EFT with a friendly yet assertive
approach that works like magic. I'm not sure where I would be without 
Maya. She became such an essential in my life that I continued working 
with her even after moving across the country two years ago. I've 
introduced her to several friends who feel the same way. I truly 
believe my path is richer for having her on it."

-K.R., Asheville, NC

About Maya: 
I am a Love Coach who helps women find and have happy, satisfying, and 
fulfilling relationships with themselves and others! I am a trained 
Yoga Teacher and Massage Therapist. I co-hosted the Marry Yourself 
Telesummit, and lead Marry Yourself Retreats. I received my Master's 
in Somatic Psychology from the California Institute of Integral 
Studies in 2009. I am trained and mentored by Dr. Diana Kirschner, a 
published author, dating coach, and therapist for over 25 years. I 
enjoy hiking, live music, dancing, and being in nature. I believe that 
having a happy, satisfying, and fulfilling relationship with yourself 
positively impacts every area of your life.

with love,

Maya

]]><![CDATA[Ready to say I do?  The Marry Yourself Telesummit is for you...]]>Wed, 21 Nov 2012 18:29:45 GMThttp://www.mayadiamond.com/blog/ready-to-say-i-do-the-marry-yourself-telesummit-is-for-youThere is nothing more important than loving yourself.  When you love yourself, everything else in your life falls into place. That’s because the deeper you can affirm your own worth, the more the world affirms it, too.                                                                            

That’s why we are calling for you...

Successful, professional women around the globe--women just like you--who are yearning for the deep sense of peace and power that only true self love can provide.

And yet, too many of us are saving the best of our love for others. We’re not giving ourselves what we want, but seeking it from others. We know we could take better care of ourselves, but...we don’t.

Say “I do” to this free telesummit if:

You’re tired of the nagging self doubt and you want to feel more confidence


Register here: http://tinyurl.com/marryyourself

For a whole month, you’ll discover how to deepen self-love and embrace your calling with 13 brilliant, successful women who are making a difference in the lives of women all across the world, and are doing it from a place of deeply centered commitment to themselves.

Featuring:

Maureen Murdock (celebrated author of the The Heroine’s Journey)
Claire Zammit (The Feminine Power Network)
Marci Shimoff (New York Times best-selling author of Love for No Reason and Women’s Chicken Soup for the Soul)
Suzanne Falter (creator of The Spiritual Diet)
Denise Linn & Meadow Linn (Hay House Radio & The Mystic Cookbook)

and many more....

Don’t miss this opportunity to say yes to deeply loving yourself and living your soul’s calling.

Register here at no-cost: http://tinyurl.com/marryyourself

With love,

Maya]]>